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Author: Subject: Le dame Mystique
Tea_Honey
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[*] posted on 4.8.2016 at 03:04 PM


Quote:
Originally posted by BMFRU2


What the freak?!!! LMAO! :lmao:

You deleted the message, but not the POST!

You have to check the DELETE THIS POST box above the "post reply" box! (There should be no record of you having EVER posted in this thread - simply deleting the "message" doesn't do that - DELETE THIS POST!!!!)




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lol.gif posted on 4.8.2016 at 03:24 PM
Moving on along....


I was checking my hair in the mirror. Yep, it's growing back. :whistle:

What I found interesting, though, is a "confirmation" of what I already knew. As my hair grows back, I notice it is:

- curly on the top of my head
- kinky on the sides, and
- wavy in the back

I have ALWAYS loved my hair. Now that it has been cut off and is growing back, it is VERY obvious how it grows. :)

P.S.
Loved my hair? People are always shocked at how I can wear my hair anyway I want without artificial means. It all starts with what I do after washing it:

If I comb my hair (after washing), it will spring up healthy and kinky.
If I brush my hair after washing, it will be wavy (really wavy in the back - oh, and I'm not talking about brushing it 100 times, either! Regular brushing).
If I put curlers in my hair (wash and curl), it will dry in "smooth" (non-kinky) curls and I can style it any way I wish. Note: Smooth curls, not "dead-straight" curled hair, as with hot-combing and curl, or perming it.

When I tell people this, they are skeptical (read: she's lying :sarcastic: ESPECIALLY after they've seen it kinky ...lol). When I "prove" it, they are all up in my hair, seeing if I put anything "on" it and surprised when they realize, nope. My natural hair. I love it.

Another thing: The different "textures" grow at different rates. It's crazy! The back wavy hair grows twice as fast as the kinky side hair (1 inch for every 1/2 inch). The top curly hair grows about half as fast as the wavy (3/4 inch for ever 1 inch).

And since I'm "dissecting" my hair, growth and texture, 10 years ago, it grew the exact opposite. It was the wavy hair that grew slowly and the curly hair that grew fast. About 10 years ago, for some reason, it "changed up."

BTW, I'm sporting a wig. When my hair was pretty much shaved off, I looked kinda cute. :flirty: Precisely because the 3 sections of hair on my head grow at different paces, I'm sporting a wig - my hair looks ragged and in bad need of a trim. But until the hair on the sides of my head grow to at least 1 1/2 inches, (enough to "trim"), I can't get one! :(




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[*] posted on 4.29.2016 at 08:01 PM


I have run into the strangest group of people I can imagine. Or maybe not. I've known "individuals" like this, but not a whole group of people.... at the same time, in the same place.

I'm in a writers' group. Joined thinking I'd found a bunch of like-career, like-minded folk. Black ones, that is. To my amazement, I'm surrounded by black people who are not so much filled with black self-hate as individualistic narcissism. They disregard any and all "facts" that go contrary to their opinion of black people (hopeless, negative, disdainful, hopeless AGAIN!). Even those (few) who are seemingly positive, I'm come to the conclusion are self-seeking and like the others, narcissistic.

Self-seeking because the leader of the group is "hopeless" about the black condition. He doesn't feel blacks as a people will ever "overcome." Which, I suppose, is the reason for his individualistic approach to all our problems as a people. While not a YT-lover, he feels we should always strive to not rock the boat, otherwise, we'll be, IDK, broke like the brother on the corner? :dunno:

Until today, really, I couldn't wrap my mind around these seemingly intelligent people's REFUSAL to deal with reality, i.e., the FACTS! I finally concluded they're simply narcissistic, i.e., it's all about them, and they're of course, pretentious **sigh**, and anything positive about black people as a whole is to be avoided at all costs. Like the article I posted on the black boys at Chicago Prep, all of whom are going to college - 7 graduating classes all went to college. "There's STILL racism!" Uh, huh? "But how many of them will graduate?" (sneeringly)

**sigh** And I thought I met pig-headed people with strange ideas who dissembled and did STRAWMAN runs to be right! on MBs. :smh:

Oh, and 75% of those disdainful of the young men's momentous accomplishment are college grads themselves, ok? But what should I have expected? These are the same people who told me I was a dayum lie when I spoke of an article I'd read that said black women were the largest race/sex demographic currently in college today.... hopeless, disdainful, wants DESPERATELY to 'look down' on other black people. And when I googled up the article, they read it, then changed the subject. :gn:

Oh, how do the narcissists interact? They either agree with each other's negativity about black people, or they grin and change the subject to talk about themselves (I'm sitting here with my mouth open as I type....) But the main thing I've learned is something, well, that I already knew - namely, that some people are more interested in keeping on the good side of other people than in truth and principles. The biblical analogy would be: Some people are more interested in putting their faith in man than in God.

To me short-sighted, as well as foolish. To them, friendship is more important than truth. :ummm: Maybe that's most people. Whateva.

P.S.
Plus they like fantasy - the pretentious bit? One member dresses to the nines, talks a good game about being a suburban housewife and writer, and uses a lot of $2 words. They eat her up. I'm looking at the suburb she lives in (majority black and working-class) and the number of books she, as a self-published author, has sold (31) - not to mention her semi-skilled husband who works for others. In short, they see a woman exuding movie star glamour while I see a pretentious, lower middleclass black woman who talks a good game and puts all her money on her back.

I know! I've gotta hang around a better class of people. :smh:




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[*] posted on 5.16.2016 at 04:33 PM


It dawned on me why I became so upset, so sick to the point of having to turn the channel on the TV when they played audio tapes of Jared talking to the woman who turned him in to the FBI. It was an instinctual act to "save" myself. I was looking into the abyss and NEEDED to look away.

The first time I truly understood that phrase - "look into the abyss long enough and it will look back at you" - was when I was watching a program with another female reporter. She, too, was shattered psychically, emotionally and afraid for her life. She, too, had made the mistake of thinking herself strong enough to look pure evil in the eye and walk away unscathed. For her 'temerity' she will live with a measure of fear for the rest of her life.

Same thing with this female who turned Jared in. Listening to him speak of his carnal lust for children to violate, "cozying" up to him to get him on tape, "pretending" they were of one accord when it came to pedophilia, did something to her. Inside. She let evil reach out and not only touch, but embrace her.... and it attacked her moral backbone and turned her insides to mush.

This is why I became so repulsed and disturbed when listening to Jared's audo tapes, i.e., I was letting evil inside my head. I was looking into the abyss and the abyss was getting a peek back at me. And so I kept turning the channel, getting a respite from the slime which threatened to turn MY insides into a gelatinous mush.




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[*] posted on 5.26.2016 at 09:30 PM


Just finished my last day of class at a world renowned Artists' institute. Wow. Just "wow." It has been the most uplifting, inspiring 'who woulda thunk!" experience. One of a lifetime. Never would I have believed I could be so comfortable with my artwork. The class gave me "permission" to NOT be 'perfect'. In so doing, the newfound freedom to well, not be perfect, unleashed a creativity, a bravery, a 'damn the torpedoes/full steam ahead!' explosion of output I didn't even know was in me. Last week, I was talking on the phone to my son and was so hyped, I felt like a Mexican jumping bean! (lol) Seriously. My head felt like it would EXPLODE I was so pumped up. And class had ended like 3 hours earlier.... and I was still feeling the adrenalin, the rush, the explosive exhilaration.

We had a potluck for the last class. It was nice. I felt good. Out of the 30 - 40 students in the class, only one wasn't all up in my face, smiling and grinning and seeking my attention. One guy even urged me to take some of his cookies - "I baked them myself, Tea." I smiled, took 2 and wondered who the heck he was. Oh, only one wasn't gushing over me? The only other black person in the class.

I enrolled in the class hoping to gain confidence in my artwork. Sista-girl came there hoping to be the "Only Negro at the party....." At least to snag a white "friend." **sigh** Peeked her hole card by the 3rd week. Seeing all the white folk continuously seeking out my company - I am nothing if NOT 'positive and passionate' about whatever I do - she snarled at me around week 5. But I'd already dismissed her trifling blackie self, so I ignored her wannabe me expression of envy and the displeasure of dashed hopes. :whistle:

Will wait at least 3 months before signing up for another class. It should take me about that long to come off this "artistic" high and return to normal ...lol.




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[*] posted on 5.28.2016 at 11:41 AM


Now that I'm come off the euphoria (crashed...lol) of the art class, the "mundane" entered my mind. The sista who came looking for a white "friend...."

In a class of 30 or 40 people, had she not been black I wouldn't have even noticed her. However, desirous of making a "black" like-minded friend, I made it a point to seek her out during the 2nd session and introduce myself. We smiled, made our pleasantries. It was at the 3rd session when I made a little 'jokey' that her true "colors" came out. Our seating was informal - sit where you want. Well, someone had moved the table before which I usually sat, thus, when I saw her in the seat (I thought) I'd formerly occupied, I laughed and said, "You're in my seat!" Like I said, no one had an "assigned" seat, thus I was expecting her to smile back.

Well! Ole girl got huffy, pointed to the equally drab white woman sitting next to her (who, incidentally, was smiling at ME), and with bucked eyes, said, "we" (as if they were part of a "team") ALWAYS sit here!" I smiled, walked away, and for the duration of the class ignored the heifer. Interestingly, the white half of the "we" - who evidently, didn't KNOW she was part of a team - changed her seat the next week and sat beside a white person thereafter.

All in all, the class was an emotionally satisfying, artistically explosive, rollicking good time. With, of course, the exception of sista-woman....

Well, that's what I get for hanging around in spaces the black (petit :sarcastic: ) bourgeois use as hunting grounds for white friends.




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[*] posted on 6.1.2016 at 11:52 PM


I keep a "Gratitude" where I('m supposed to :whistle: ) write 5 things daily that I am grateful for. Since I've mentioned the Art class, thought I'd share some of my impressions over the course of the class (culled from the Gratitude journal):

Quote:

My head was exploding yesterday! My mind is expanding exponentially The insights and epiphanies stretching my imagination and exploding in my head are unprecedented and astounding. I feel infinitely more confident in my art, and knowledgeable about the art world than I could have anticipated or believed possible.


My last entry, 2 days after the last class:

Quote:

I am grateful if not for the free-fall, the crash from the euphoria of the class, then certainly for the euphoric experience.


As I read through the journal, I saw 'references' to the class as being almost overwhelming to my senses, but, well, like I said, I'm SUPPOSED to write in it every day. Unfortunately, not only do I not, :spank: but well, I have so much to be grateful for and only 5 entries to write them in! :dunno:

psssst! I start each entry with: I am grateful for my HEALTH! Only 4 more gratefuls left, ok? Oh, and usually one spot is reserved for "I am grateful I'm like the man with a plot of land and a mule, i.e., I'm doing all right for myself (read: ...grateful I'm not a bag lady!)!" ;)




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[*] posted on 6.2.2016 at 04:32 PM


I was looking at one of the foreign news stations carried by PBS. They were reporting on the Taliban and Al Quaida, showing Afghan soldiers and generals and NATO commanders.... and while faint visions of Muslim women being minimalized, brutalized, their souls being sucked out of them floated into my mind... all I could think was how white people have mucked up the world... for other peoples.

While I despise the Taliban and shiver at the soullessness of men who not only feel its their right, but execute Godless terror on their mothers, daughters and sisters.... and am glad I'm not in their filthy clutches.... 15 years ago, those women had a chance. 9/11 and the bogus 'weapons of mass destruction' was the excuse for Bush and Chaney to invade North Africa and southern Asia (Afghanistan) and destroy its governments and institutions. It was they who opened the doors to the current-day monsters who have taken control and wreaked even MORE havoc in that part of the world. As well as made this part of the world where black Cocoa Loungers live, infinitely less secure than it was before.

Watching only 5 minutes of that news cast made me realize, on a gut level, just how tenuous our very lives are.




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[*] posted on 6.2.2016 at 07:10 PM


Okay. I've had time to reflect on the previous post. What brought it about was that I had watched 2 programs before the newscast that brought it about.

There is so much evil afoot in the world.

The first program was about a serial killer in the Ukraine. They estimate he killed about 50 people before being caught. However, there's a 10 year period between murders where he was traveling throughout Europe, so I'm predicting he murdered a hellava lot more than they know about. He killed couples, but mostly families, i.e., mom, dad, kids. Prolly killed them because of the horrors of his upbringing. His mother died and his father put him in an orphanage.... and kept his older brother. Following in the footsteps of the 70% of kids raised in orphanages in Ukraine who wind up in jail, he killed people randomly and brutally. If he saw you at McDonald's with your family, there was a good chance he'd follow you home and kill you all.

Ukraine, it turns out, is not a place you want to be "interrogated." The cops found a guy they thought was the killer. Despite protesting his innocence, they tortured him until he died. At any rate, the psychopath considered himself to be the world's best killer. I looked at the program and thought he was the world's LUCKIEST killer for murdering so many for so long before being caught.

Next up was a homegrown sadist. She was the "nicest" woman in town, would do anything for anyone. Uh huh. She and her follower-husband brutalized their 3 daughters, slapping and punching, whateva (prolly some sexual, but they didn't say so). She invited a woman, Kathy, fresh from a break-up and facing eviction to live with her fam in a secluded, wooded area outside town. She sucked her (and others) in with her "kindliness." Upshot, she and hubby tortured Kathy, made her crawl throughout the house, butt naked, on her hands and knees. Forced the kids to poke her with pencils (sadists like to drag others into their sickness). She eventually killed Kathy, had hubby burn her body in the secluded woods, then take bucketsful of her ashes and dump them in 2 different bodies of water (he was a surfer :sarcastic: ). 3 years later, Kathy's people filed a missing person's report. When cops came to her last known residence, "nicest lady in town" told them she had awakened one morning to find a note from Kathy saying she had gone off with a trucker to California. Even showed them letters Kathy supposedly sent.

Sadist had a nephew. He moved in with them when he was 12. At age 17, he threatened to go to police and tell them she killed Kathy. Had hubby shoot him with a shotgun in the back of the head and burn HIS body in the secluded woods. She filed a report on him as a run-away.

An older gay guy who was dumped by his partner after 40 years, moved into town. Soon after, he lost his job. No job and nursing a broken heart, "nice" lady befriended him, told him to move in with her and family. Long story short, they killed him.

One of the daughters got away (forget how). She went to cops and told them about the horrors in her house and that moms had killed Kathy. Rightfully scared of her mother, she refused to be taped. They investigated, but with no evidence... and the fact that daughter later went into hiding.... they dropped the case (at the time, daughter didn't know nephew had been killed and gay guy hadn't moved in yet).

Second daughter (oldest?) escaped from home. She hooked up with her sister, now 25, and with her courage bolstered, she and sis went back to cops. Told them there was one more daughter being brutalized in that house and they wanted to save her. Cops and CPS went to home, not to arrest but to remove 12 year old from the house. Said 12 year old came with them willingly, grateful to be out of that house.

Sadist sent Sadist, Jr. to police station to get their daughter back. Under questioning, Sadist, Jr. confessed to the torture and murders. He and Sadist were arrested. He was convicted on his confession. Prosecutors couldn't use him as a witness against Sadist because of spousal privilege - husband can't testify against his wife, and vice versa. Sadist made an Alfred plea - admits the evidence against her will prolly result in her conviction, but claims she's NOT guilty. Without the husband's testimony (no bodies, no evidence), there was no way they could convict her, so prosecutors accepted. She got somewhere between 10 and 22 years (forget - just that she won't get out until she's 76 years old).

Btw, I've known evil people like the Sadist (not killing people, but in their own way, as evil). Not knowing what's going on behind closed doors, the community thinks they're "swell." :smh: Oh, same thing with the small town they lived in. One guy was messed up wondering how could all that go on and nobody know it?

So, anyway, that's what brought on the pessimism at the news report. Why it got to me. There's just so much evil in this world - in far off places, and here at home. And whether we want to confront it or turn a blind eye, in our own communities.




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[*] posted on 6.6.2016 at 08:24 PM
On a brighter note...


I've just come in from cutting thick braches on my Evergreen trees. Yep. In my 'old age' I've turned into a lumberjack.

Still, as much as one desires to be healthy, there's that corresponding need to be "feminine." As such, and in counterpoint to mucking around sappy trees, I have been invited to and will attend my very first "Garden Party." :flirty:

It's being held in one of Chicago's poshier suburbs. An artist friend is coming as my "Plus 1." Reason I asked him -- and he eagerly accepted -- is because there are going to be a lot of theatre folk there (notice I wrote "theatRE" rather than garden variety movie house "theAtER" ;) ), as well as, well, with me, a 'couple' of authors. It's going to be an "artsy" crowd. I used to have a gauzy dress that I called my 'garden party' dress. Wish I still had it.




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[*] posted on 6.8.2016 at 01:47 PM
Why me?


Finally settled on the 'perfect' dress, the 'perfect' accessories to wow 'em at the Garden Party and....

Anaphylactic shock. :uglyazzwoman:

**sigh** More like scare the crap outta 'em.

I had an allergic reaction to some hair dye. My head swelled up so badly, I look like I've been in a prize fight.... and lost. Real bad. Forehead swollen slick and shiny, eyelids and under eyes fat and puffy. And I do mean 'puffy.' Eyes mere slits in between the fat little sausages above and below them. Tips of my ears oozing pus (for 24 hours!). Head so big it stretched the wig with the big bangs that I threw over it to cover my barely human-looking forehead before I called my HMO and requested an emergency visit.

Got a shot.... another first.... in the butt of cortisone and have to take a pill a day for 5 days. Hopefully, all the swelling will have gone down and the skin that is not so 'elastic' these days will retracted by the appointed date. Ah! Sometimes I feel like Al Bundy - for every good thing that happens to me an equal and opposite bad thing comes right behind to make me pay DEARLY for it.

Which is why I am soooo thankful for my "happy" gene. The one that says no matter how difficult, ugly or miserable a situation I find myself in, I can always bounce back by pulling happiness out of it.

So in answer to the question posed: Why NOT me who was born knowing how to make lemonade out of lemons. Either that, or how to ignore the bad and concentrate on the good.




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[*] posted on 6.8.2016 at 02:08 PM
Speaking of my Artist friend....


You know, it's weird. I seem to gravitate toward artistic people (you know, the broke bustas? ;) ). My Plus 1 at the garden party I've known since we were twentysomethings. I played in informal card tournaments throughout my thirties and my partner was a paint artist. My Plus 1, btw, is a cartoonist. Even on MBs, I usually find sympatico with an artist/s. James is a photo artist and another internet buddy is a musician whose mother was a dancer.

Speaking of artists, I must relate some of my Art class experiences (such as why I no longer think of Picasso as an over-rated butcher of the female body ...lol). But not now. Too busy every 10 minutes looking into the mirror to see if the swelling has gone down in my face. It's been nearly 24 hours and with the shot in the butt and having taken my first pill, I notice my head is no longer outsized, i.e., I don't look like a waterhead baby.

Although around the eyes are still swollen sacs of 'stretched' **sigh** flesh.




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[*] posted on 6.11.2016 at 11:08 PM


Just returned from "garden party." **sigh** It was really nice until my friend almost made me go off on him.... :smh:

We're sitting at this table beneath a lovely awning. Table has seating for 6 - 3 people on opposite sides. Ok! I'm at the end of the table; there's a platter of cheese pate and crackers in front of me. Middle chair has a table centerpiece before it. Last chair has another platter of cheese and crackers, only with hard cheese. Me and friend sitting. White couple comes up and sits on opposite side of table. White woman behind the centerpiece; white guy behind the platter of hard cheese. Everything's fine until white guy gets up, walks to my end of the table, and without a 'by your leave' (read: my bad), picks up the platter of cheese pate and crackers before me and takes it to HIS end of the table for him and his companion to enjoy BOTH types of cheeses. Of course, 2 types of cheeses at their end of the table leaves NO cheese at MY end.... for me!

What the freak?:po:

Fuming, I tell my friend to retrieve the platter of cheese pate now before the white couple.... now!

My "friend" picks up the platter and returns it to its original placement before me. Everything is right with the world again... until he calls one of the hosts over and asks him for a "new" container of cheese pate. Now I'm wondering if there's something "nasty" about the white folk that he feels I should need a fresh 'batch' of cheese pate....

Nah, that wasn't his purpose. When the host came back with a fresh container, he... well, cutting to the chase. My 'friend" wanted not only a new container of cheese pate, but he wanted a new tray and crackers to go along with it. He planned to give it to the white couple.... to replace the old one they took from me that he took from them!

I put the impudent mofos in their place when I demanded ole boy get MY cheese pate platter back! DUMBO doesn't want to upset the selfish, arrogant, ENTITLED white folks so he orders a new tray of cheese and crackers for them.... to go along with the one ALREADY placed before them!

Seriously, I had to stop myself from going off on him.... so much... cause yea, I did put him on mini-blast - I put somebody in their place; you pick them up, dust them off and give them a platter of cheese! :banghead:

Whateva.

Good time had by all. I looked cute in my floral, silky-gauzy sleeveless dress (we're talking 91 degrees in the shade!). Talked to the guest of honor for about 15 minutes -an author. The people who threw the garden party are theatre people and are putting on a stage play of one of his books. Friend loved the guests (obviously :sarcastic: ), the atmosphere, the garden (it was nice and blooming), the "posh" locale.....




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[*] posted on 6.14.2016 at 07:22 AM
Another perspective on the Garden Party


The Garden Party was delightful! It was a fund-raiser for a new play the Pegasus theatre in Chicago will be putting on in November, 2016.

The author of the book that the play is based on was the guest of honor at the gathering. I found him to be intelligent, well-versed in his craft and an extremely easy person to talk to. Open, engaging, with none of the affectation of the prima donna (or the lead actor in the play ;) ), he really made my day. As ever, my bud who hosted the affair was bright and bubbly and mother earthy (lol) and treated the party-goers to the most sumptuous gumbo I've ever tasted! And it was shocking for the gumbo had NO sea food in it - chicken and sausage gumbo. Oh, and the 4 "sauces" to choose from - HOT sauce, EXTRA hot sauce, Hell Fire and tabasco.

Wine and cheese (and beer and sparkling water if you wanted - lol), then the gumbo, and the most sumptuous fare of all was finally served - a most delicious bread pudding with crème fresh as a topper. Oh my....

The surrounding garden was lovely, with numerous types of green plants and bushes (attracted mosquitoes, too!) surrounding a stone patio. 2 musicians playing strange (Indian) instruments like a sitkar and something that my friend called a version of a "rain stick" (pebbles sliding on the insides of a drum-like instrument that sounded like rain falling). They and the sound of "real" water spouting from a statue, were a lovely background presence to a stimulating affair. The conversation flowed easily and lucidly and when it was over, my friend thanked me for dragging him into having such a wonderfully pleasant time.




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[*] posted on 6.26.2016 at 09:35 PM
I need a better class of friends


Why do I attract the.... whatevas! :po: If they're not noseying around in my (financial) business, they're talking crazy... **sigh**



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