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Author: Subject: having a thought
deep_thinker
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[*] posted on 5.4.2011 at 10:05 AM
Fleetwood Mac - Songbird


For you, there'll be no more crying
For you, the sun will be shining
And I feel that when I'm with you, it's alright
I know it's right

To you, I'll give the world
To you, I'll never be cold
Cause I feel that when I'm with you, it's alright
I know it's right

And the songbirds are singing like they know the score
And I love you
I love you
I love you
Like never before

And I wish you all the love in the world
But most of all
I wish it from myself

And the songbirds keep singing like they know the score
And I love you
I love you
I love you
Like never before
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[*] posted on 6.2.2011 at 01:24 PM
Your Love Horoscope - Daily


Nostalgia and issues from the past may play a role in your romantic efforts today, Capricorn. Whether you are single or attached, you are getting a sense of security today from events in the past or a sense of roots that you hold. You are wanting to belong to one person on a private, personal, and intimate level, and you can expect to see some progress with this today. Today is a day where you need to be needed, and you will find the opportunities arise for you to express this well and obtain precisely what your heart is desiring.
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[*] posted on 7.26.2011 at 02:58 PM
hetep


Apparently because I'm happy I haven't had anything to really journal about.

Life has, for the most part, been fantastic. We've gone through some things but we go through them together. Side by side, hand in hand. We walk together. Read, fight, work, play, love. Together.

Seems to make everything else smaller. My family, my friends. They think that I am only seeing the world through the lens of him. But I'm not. Instead I am seeing the world through the lens of love. Through the lens of happy. Through the lens of peace.

And when that is your perspective, there may be ups and downs but there is always understanding. There is always that inner knowledge that reminds you that you have gotten through so much and will get through so much more. This knowledge comforts you and holds you close. This keeps you warm. This sustains you.

I am sustained right now. So despite all that is happening in my life I am warm and comforted and aware. I find myself having a sense of clarity that was always missing before. I keep all things in better perspective. I face life with a renewed sense of vigor and purpose.

It would be so easy to say he gave me that. But he didn't. Inner peace, inner clarity, these are gifts from NTR. He just helped me recognize what I've always had. Who I have always been.

I am better now because my relationship with God is better, which means my relationship with self is better, which means all of my relationships can be better. I am happy now because I love God better which means I can love myself better which means I can love others better.

There are ups and there are downs, but I am finally enjoying the ride.
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[*] posted on 1.5.2012 at 07:27 PM
A reflection on the eve of my twenty-ninth day of birth


I know there is nothing and no one but my Creator who could have brought the sun, moon, stars, and planets into alignment, who could have brought my mother and father together with precision and divine accuracy, who could have guided my life on this path of self-realization, that I may become the woman that I am today. I take credit only for being open to light and truth, for having faith in my inner divinity, for accepting the lessons in all my life's challenges. I am so proud of the life that I actively choose to live. I continue to accept the responsibility of living a righteous life and proving myself worthy of the blessings that I have been given. I know that the next years of my life will be filled with blessings beyond my wildest imagination, and for this I give unrelenting thanks and praise. For none of us can truly perceive the magnitude of NTR, and none of us can know true abundance without NTR.
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[*] posted on 3.28.2012 at 11:25 AM
The Oracle


On Monday morning I had a dream. I dreamt that several of us were together in the home of an older woman. She was bent over slightly in her back and walked with a cane, which is similar to the Medu NTR determinative that represents the wisdom of the elder. Because of that I will call her Sen-Urt, elder sister. She looked at me and told me that she had a message for me. Those in the room started to leave but I lingered behind, out of respect for Sen-Urt. She told me that the man in my life is the right man, and do not ever doubt that or lose faith in that. She told me to hold on with patience for all of my concerns would soon be washed away. She told me that I had been heard by the NTRU and the Ancestors and I would see evidence of that very soon. I thanked Sen-Urt profusely as I stood to exit. For some reason exiting was not easy and it took a while for me to find my way out. When I did all of those who were there with me were now on the lawn waiting for me. He was there as well and all was right.

This message was previously given to me at the New Life Expo several years ago. I believed it then and I believe it now. I know to be patient while you wait for something you truly cannot wait for is to suffer slowly and silently. But suffering is never in vain and I continue to be patient while all things fall into divine right order. I may not know what the universe has in store for me. I may not know or understand the intricate details of the plan. But I place my faith and my life in the hands of my God. God is here with me and all is right.
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[*] posted on 4.14.2012 at 11:14 PM
L.O.V.E. - Jessie J


I said I'd never write a song about love
But when it feels this good a song fits like a glove
When you hold me
And you tell me
That you missed me
And call me gummy
F^(% it
Imma write a song about love

You're my key
You unlock me
Keep me close
Keep me safe
Keep me happy
So sweet, oh love

It's destiny
So nothing stops me
I'll tell the world that your mine and you got me
So sweet, oh love

I'm in love
I'm in love
I'm in love
L.O.V.E. love

See love doesn't choose a boy or a girl
When I met you
You hugged my heart and filled my world
So you can stare
I don't care
You're the one
Ain't going nowhere
So F^(% it
Imma be honest
With you cause

You're my key
You unlock me
Keep me close
Keep me safe
Keep me happy
So sweet, oh love

It's destiny
So nothing stops me
I'll tell the world that your mine and you got me
So sweet, oh love

I'm in love
I'm in love
I'm in love
L.O.V.E. love

My best friend that makes me laugh
The puzzle piece that fits exact to my half
I've never felt this way
Sometimes I'm stuck with what to say
You hold my hands when I'm driving
You dry my tears if I'm crying
And we just laugh if were fighting
I love you
You love me more
I love you more more
You love me more
I love you more

I love you more

You're my key
You unlock me
Keep me close
Keep me safe
Keep me happy
So sweet, oh love

It's destiny
So nothing stops me
I'll tell the world that your mine and you got me
So sweet, oh love

I'm in love
I'm in love
I'm in love
L.O.V.E. love
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[*] posted on 4.7.2014 at 02:47 PM
broken


I thought we were going through this together. I thought we were a team. I thought that when you were ready you would turn to me. I believed that it was me and you. You kept saying that now you have a woman who is okay with you being polygamous and you donít even want anyone else, you just want me. I wanted to believe you so badly. I waited for you. Patiently. I have never waited for anyone, but I waited for you. I never wanted to cheat on you like other women had, or lie to you or hurt you.

I kept your secret. I never told anyone that we werenít having sex. I tried to act like everything was fine. I hated myself for wanting sex when I knew you were struggling. I felt selfish and insensitive and still I waited, faithfully. All the while you were lying to me for months, keeping me in the dark about what you were going through and purposely being dishonest about the nature of your relationship with her. I was practically begging you for honesty, begging you to be open with me and you refused. You refused me. You slept with that girl several times, not just once, and you claim that you donít want to be with her but you were keeping me in the dark and on ice and waiting. For you.

And I am still waiting. You still do not want me. Even before I admitted, unprovoked, that I had confided in someone, someone who I did not sleep with, someone who allowed me to cry about you on her shoulders, you turned away my advances. I tried to get close to you and you pulled away. You rejected me. You lied to me and rejected me and broke my heart.

I loved you. Now I am the one suffering. My heart is devastated. You did that. You are the only one who could. You told me once that you would hurt me. That was the one thing you said that I never wanted to believe and that was the one that turned out to be the most true.

I really hope it was worth it. I hope it was worth ruining us. You can be mad at me all you want but you ruined us. You ruined me.
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